(Challenge #15: Death Knell) Swifter
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tinyfandomflashTitle: Swifter
Author: Apache Firecat
Fandom: The Beverly Hillbillies (TV)
Rating: PG-13/T
Category: M/F
Relationship(s): Rock/Elly Mae
Character(s): Rock, Jethro
Word Count: 1,279
Spoiler: N/A
Summary: The day isn't moving swiftly enough for Rock Hudson. The production certainly isn't! But there's something else in his life, far more important, that's moving along quite nicely, and swifter than he'd expected!
Notes/Warnings: N/A
The old church bell tolled. Slowly, surely, it rang out over the desert ground, which, of course, wasn't desert at all but pounds and pounds of sand that had been brought in, mostly to make this very scene as realistic as possible. The villain, dressed all in telltale black, took his walk, but when the cameras swung to catch the hero or, rather, the hero's sidekick...
Rock cussed and fussed under his breath and tore his cowboy hat off of his head. Where the heck was Jethro?! Spinning around, kicking up dust with his cowboy boots, he spotted the hillbilly sitting and dining in the shade. The boy held two drumsticks, each nearly as big as his meaty hand. "JETHRO!" Rock thundered. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN?!"
The death knoll completed behind him, but it was completing its noon-day ringing. The scene was already destroyed. They could splice the camera rolls together, but the moment was completely destroyed, all because of Jethro Bodine's appetite! The villain was also fussing, and Rock knew that they were paying the other actor well -- not as well as he himself was paid, of course, but well nonetheless. There were dozens of other pictures his colleague could have opted for, but he had chosen to work with him instead.
"JUST HOLD ON!" Rock called to him. "I'LL FIX IT!" Steaming, he headed for Jethro, who continued to recline lazily in the tent's shade.
"Ain't nothin' needs fixin'," he called back to Rock from around a mouthful of chicken. "This food's fine! Not as good as Granny fixes or back home, but you city people can at least fry chickens!"
Rock growled, his hands balling into fists. "JETHRO, I TOOK A CHANCE ON YOU -- " he started.
"Yeah, and I took a chance on these here viddles, but they're actually good! I'll tell Uncle Jed y'all been treatin' me real well!"
His uncle's name stopped Rock in his tracks. He forced his fingers apart, opening his fists, and then closed them tightly again. He repeated the maneuver several times, but despite what his acting coach had told him, the movements were not easing his fury at all. "JETHRO, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE OUT THERE!" he finally bellowed, pointing at the makeshift desert landscape. His colleague, the only other actually well-trained actor on the set, had whipped his Stetson off as well and was headed right toward them. Jethro was going to get it fast if Rock didn't do something -- and quick!
Jethro gnawed the last meat off of a now-completely cleaned bone and tossed it behind his shoulder. He grabbed another one. "Naw, I'm fine right here where I'm at! Where's my mind, Rock? I'm sorry! All this actin' business has got me real hungry! You want some?" He actually picked his feet up off of the chair across from him and set them down, freeing a chair for Rock.
Rock groaned and dragged a hand over his face. The boy clearly had no idea what he was doing here, but then, that's what everybody else had warned him of already! Everybody but his producer who said they needed the boy's uncle's money, the bank President who had hurriedly agreed, and Jed Clampett himself, who had thanked him privately for making Jethro's dream a reality. Jed had thanked him, and so, too, had Elly.
An altogether different kind of groan slipped out of Rock's mouth as he felt a sudden strain at the tight center of his jeans. Elly Mae Clampett's pa might have the money they all needed and wanted, but she had every bit as much beauty and as many curves as J.D. Clampett had dollars! And it was that gorgeous, little lady who Rock was truly aiming to please, and get closer to, by allowing her nephew the role of his sidekick in his film. Jethro was supposed to be out there, going naively into a duel with the villain, and he was supposed to play the hero, rescuing Jethro's character as well as the whole town.
Elly had actually asked him last night, while sitting in his lap with her arms draped around his neck, if he'd rescue her too if a villain ever came bothering her family. He had, of course, assured her he would -- not that Elly needed much help defending herself or anyone else. That girl was as strong as an ox! That was exactly why he liked her so much -- well, it was one of the reasons why anyway, he thought, painfully aware of the pulsating sensations between his legs.
Elly Mae was so strong because she was from the hills, and not Beverly Hills. She was unlike any other girl throughout all these Hills. Her beauty was real, neither pretend or accented by any form of makeup, and her personality was just as genuine. Of all the girls he had met out here in Cali, she was the only one of whom he could never imagine himself growing tired. He wanted Elly beside him all the time, even if the thought of marriage still scared him. He was, after all, still a young buck, but --
"WHAT IS HE DOING?!" his colleague demanded, charging up underneath the tent.
Rock put out his hands, caught the other man's shoulders, and stopped him still. "That's J.D. Clampett's nephew," he started.
"So? I don't care who J.D. Clampett is! If he's not going to do his job -- "
"Jed Clampett is the father of Elly Mae Clampett!"
"Oh! You mean that pretty, little thing you were bouncing last night? I'd like to bounce her somewhere -- " The leer on the other man's face made Rock's teeth grit and his hands fist again. He focused on refraining his temper, but when the other actor continued, "I'd like to get her on my couch! You know what I mean, Rock, right between my -- "
His fist pummeled straight into the other actor's face. Before Rock could stop himself, he'd decked the other guy. "Shoot!" he exclaimed, stomping his boot and looking down at the man, who was out cold. "Now I'm gonna have to get me another sidekick and another villain!"
"You don't have to have another sidekick," Jethro put in from behind him. Rock turned to look at him, and the boy held up a drumstick. "Come eat some, Rock. That'll cool you off!"
"I don't want to eat! I don't want to -- " Rock Hudson stopped. He knew what he wanted. It was what or, rather, who he always seemed to want lately. He wanted Elly Mae Clampett. "We'll pick up tomorrow," he stated loudly so all the crew could hear.
"Pick up what tomorrow?" Jethro asked, chewing meat off a bone.
Rock growled, turned, and stomped away. His producer could be angry all he wanted. At least he wouldn't have to eat crow where Elly was concerned. He'd keep her and her pa happy, and that should keep his producer and agent off his back. He thought of his colleague, and the field-day the tabloids would undoubtedly have with the star he'd decked out, but he just couldn't find it in him to care. With the thought of Elly Mae Clampett in his mind, he was already feeling cooler, and hotter in an altogether different way.
Very soon, Rock sped away from the studio, whistling a merry tune. They'd try the scene again tomorrow, if they didn't have to hire a different villain. Even if they did, he just couldn't seem to care. After all, all Jethro's appetite and buffoonery had done, in the end, was bring him closer to Elly. He could have all afternoon with her instead of just the night now!
The End
Author: Apache Firecat
Fandom: The Beverly Hillbillies (TV)
Rating: PG-13/T
Category: M/F
Relationship(s): Rock/Elly Mae
Character(s): Rock, Jethro
Word Count: 1,279
Spoiler: N/A
Summary: The day isn't moving swiftly enough for Rock Hudson. The production certainly isn't! But there's something else in his life, far more important, that's moving along quite nicely, and swifter than he'd expected!
Notes/Warnings: N/A
The old church bell tolled. Slowly, surely, it rang out over the desert ground, which, of course, wasn't desert at all but pounds and pounds of sand that had been brought in, mostly to make this very scene as realistic as possible. The villain, dressed all in telltale black, took his walk, but when the cameras swung to catch the hero or, rather, the hero's sidekick...
Rock cussed and fussed under his breath and tore his cowboy hat off of his head. Where the heck was Jethro?! Spinning around, kicking up dust with his cowboy boots, he spotted the hillbilly sitting and dining in the shade. The boy held two drumsticks, each nearly as big as his meaty hand. "JETHRO!" Rock thundered. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN?!"
The death knoll completed behind him, but it was completing its noon-day ringing. The scene was already destroyed. They could splice the camera rolls together, but the moment was completely destroyed, all because of Jethro Bodine's appetite! The villain was also fussing, and Rock knew that they were paying the other actor well -- not as well as he himself was paid, of course, but well nonetheless. There were dozens of other pictures his colleague could have opted for, but he had chosen to work with him instead.
"JUST HOLD ON!" Rock called to him. "I'LL FIX IT!" Steaming, he headed for Jethro, who continued to recline lazily in the tent's shade.
"Ain't nothin' needs fixin'," he called back to Rock from around a mouthful of chicken. "This food's fine! Not as good as Granny fixes or back home, but you city people can at least fry chickens!"
Rock growled, his hands balling into fists. "JETHRO, I TOOK A CHANCE ON YOU -- " he started.
"Yeah, and I took a chance on these here viddles, but they're actually good! I'll tell Uncle Jed y'all been treatin' me real well!"
His uncle's name stopped Rock in his tracks. He forced his fingers apart, opening his fists, and then closed them tightly again. He repeated the maneuver several times, but despite what his acting coach had told him, the movements were not easing his fury at all. "JETHRO, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE OUT THERE!" he finally bellowed, pointing at the makeshift desert landscape. His colleague, the only other actually well-trained actor on the set, had whipped his Stetson off as well and was headed right toward them. Jethro was going to get it fast if Rock didn't do something -- and quick!
Jethro gnawed the last meat off of a now-completely cleaned bone and tossed it behind his shoulder. He grabbed another one. "Naw, I'm fine right here where I'm at! Where's my mind, Rock? I'm sorry! All this actin' business has got me real hungry! You want some?" He actually picked his feet up off of the chair across from him and set them down, freeing a chair for Rock.
Rock groaned and dragged a hand over his face. The boy clearly had no idea what he was doing here, but then, that's what everybody else had warned him of already! Everybody but his producer who said they needed the boy's uncle's money, the bank President who had hurriedly agreed, and Jed Clampett himself, who had thanked him privately for making Jethro's dream a reality. Jed had thanked him, and so, too, had Elly.
An altogether different kind of groan slipped out of Rock's mouth as he felt a sudden strain at the tight center of his jeans. Elly Mae Clampett's pa might have the money they all needed and wanted, but she had every bit as much beauty and as many curves as J.D. Clampett had dollars! And it was that gorgeous, little lady who Rock was truly aiming to please, and get closer to, by allowing her nephew the role of his sidekick in his film. Jethro was supposed to be out there, going naively into a duel with the villain, and he was supposed to play the hero, rescuing Jethro's character as well as the whole town.
Elly had actually asked him last night, while sitting in his lap with her arms draped around his neck, if he'd rescue her too if a villain ever came bothering her family. He had, of course, assured her he would -- not that Elly needed much help defending herself or anyone else. That girl was as strong as an ox! That was exactly why he liked her so much -- well, it was one of the reasons why anyway, he thought, painfully aware of the pulsating sensations between his legs.
Elly Mae was so strong because she was from the hills, and not Beverly Hills. She was unlike any other girl throughout all these Hills. Her beauty was real, neither pretend or accented by any form of makeup, and her personality was just as genuine. Of all the girls he had met out here in Cali, she was the only one of whom he could never imagine himself growing tired. He wanted Elly beside him all the time, even if the thought of marriage still scared him. He was, after all, still a young buck, but --
"WHAT IS HE DOING?!" his colleague demanded, charging up underneath the tent.
Rock put out his hands, caught the other man's shoulders, and stopped him still. "That's J.D. Clampett's nephew," he started.
"So? I don't care who J.D. Clampett is! If he's not going to do his job -- "
"Jed Clampett is the father of Elly Mae Clampett!"
"Oh! You mean that pretty, little thing you were bouncing last night? I'd like to bounce her somewhere -- " The leer on the other man's face made Rock's teeth grit and his hands fist again. He focused on refraining his temper, but when the other actor continued, "I'd like to get her on my couch! You know what I mean, Rock, right between my -- "
His fist pummeled straight into the other actor's face. Before Rock could stop himself, he'd decked the other guy. "Shoot!" he exclaimed, stomping his boot and looking down at the man, who was out cold. "Now I'm gonna have to get me another sidekick and another villain!"
"You don't have to have another sidekick," Jethro put in from behind him. Rock turned to look at him, and the boy held up a drumstick. "Come eat some, Rock. That'll cool you off!"
"I don't want to eat! I don't want to -- " Rock Hudson stopped. He knew what he wanted. It was what or, rather, who he always seemed to want lately. He wanted Elly Mae Clampett. "We'll pick up tomorrow," he stated loudly so all the crew could hear.
"Pick up what tomorrow?" Jethro asked, chewing meat off a bone.
Rock growled, turned, and stomped away. His producer could be angry all he wanted. At least he wouldn't have to eat crow where Elly was concerned. He'd keep her and her pa happy, and that should keep his producer and agent off his back. He thought of his colleague, and the field-day the tabloids would undoubtedly have with the star he'd decked out, but he just couldn't find it in him to care. With the thought of Elly Mae Clampett in his mind, he was already feeling cooler, and hotter in an altogether different way.
Very soon, Rock sped away from the studio, whistling a merry tune. They'd try the scene again tomorrow, if they didn't have to hire a different villain. Even if they did, he just couldn't seem to care. After all, all Jethro's appetite and buffoonery had done, in the end, was bring him closer to Elly. He could have all afternoon with her instead of just the night now!
The End
